you got it (the write stuff)

Dear, diary:

I’m not happy with my blog right now.

I’m holding back.

I’m being lazy.

I’m lacking focus.

Here’s the problem:

My balls aren’t to a wall of any sort.

Not even a half wall.

Or a railing.

Balls are in.

Balls need to be out.

Am I saying balls a lot?

I want to write fearlessly.

I want to write as if I think the fucking words will expire if I don’t get them down quickly enough.

And I want to write “fucking” more.

And I want to do it now.


I’ve lost that blogging loving feeling (whoa-oh oh) and I’m afraid I won’t get it back.

Not afraid like I’m afraid I’ll accidentally watch Bridesmaids, but I’m kinda nervous, yo.

Must. Fix. It.

I want to write like I don’t care who’s reading.

Not you.

Or him.

Or her.

Or your mom.

I want to write like I’ll be equally satisfied if I get a thousand comments (and three hundred marriage proposals) or nothing but crickets.

I want to write things that make people jealous.

I want to write things that’ll make me concerned I’ll never be able to write that way again.

I feel like blogging has changed a lot since I loved it most.

People are specializing.

People are monetizing.

People are twitter-izing.

And more power to them.

But I want to find the people that are bringing it.

And I want you to point them out to me. (Seriously.)

I want to read people who are putting everything into their writing.

Whatever they’re writing.

If it’s a recipe blog, I want to read people who are greasing the hell out of their goddamn baking sheets.

I’m not happy with blogging in general, really.

But I can’t control that.

I CAN, however, do my part to try to make blogging awesomer.

I surely can.

I want to write words that…

Need to be written.
Belong together.
Make you stop.

I want to write words that make me NEED to write so fucking many more.

I want to write things that make me afraid I’ve gone too far.

And then I want to write things that go farther.

I want to write.

Balls meet wall.

Let’s do this.

7 thoughts on “you got it (the write stuff)

  1. Dance like nobody is watching…nah…


    Then you’re writing just for you. Chase the muse as she trips along through the crevices of your imagination. She’s a tricky little bitch, but she’ll give up the goods once you corner her.

    I love your stuff here and even shamelessly stole the word doodle format once, giving you due credit, of course.

    Keep going, Peter. I can’t wait to see what comes out of your word cauldron next.

  2. Agreed. Unfortunately I don’t know a heckuva lot of balls to the wallzers, myself included. I used to be braver and then my family started reading my blog (barf). I’d have a shit-ton more material if I could write about those crazy assholes. Best of luck and I’ll work on my edge.

  3. I want to write “fucking” more, too. I always hold back for whatever reason, but really? Anyone who’s spent more than an hour talking to me outside of a professional setting knows that I say “fuck” A LOT. Good luck with the “balls to the wall” thing!

  4. maybe i’m a fucking asshole for saying this, but i think you should read my fucking blog. because i am really trying to be in the place you are describing. really trying. balls out. i am glad to meet you and read your words via the indie ink thing. yep, glad.

  5. I’m just Marian’s sheep. Well, not just her sheep, but anyway. She sent me here. I like it. I may stay. Especially with all this balls-out writing.

    Gotta respect that.

  6. holy fuck

    you make me realize why I’m a writer.

    you make me want to write more, and more real.

    and bridesmaids was hilarious

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