Top Ten TV Characters I Would Totally Date (If I Didn’t Have an Awesome Girlfriend, and If They Were Real and Junk)

Lorelei Gilmore – Gilmore Girls (Lauren Graham): I’m not sure what the manly version of a swoon is, but she makes me have them. Sure she talks a lot. So much so that I’d probably occasionally have to ask, “Can I interest you in six or seven packs of chewing gum?” But witty is one of my top three favorite kinds of banter. She’s smart and funny. She drives a jeep. And she seems very open-minded about dudes who eschew shaving and constantly rock baseball caps.

Andy McNally – Rookie Blue (Missy Peregrym): The other day I was walking through a room and Rookie Blue was on TV. Andy McNally was standing in a kitchen wearing… Well it was just delightful. Sadly Miss Peregrym and I have a real life friend in common, so she’s like… an actual person to me. Thanks for ruining my low-grade objectifying, real life friend!

Winnie Cooper – The Wonder Years (Danica McKellar): You know, assuming grown-up Winnie, or teen-aged me. The ultimate girl next door. And she always looked at least mildly displeased. I feel like dating me would be a very natural transition for her.

Donna Moss – The West Wing (Janel Moloney): “If you were in an accident, I wouldn’t stop for red lights.” Come on.

Amy Gardner – The West Wing (Mary Louise Parker): Very smart. Sexy. Maybe tooooo sexy. Every facial expression (and her voice) would always kind of seem like this woman was trying to seduce me. (Something I assume most of the time anyway.) She’d say, “Do the recycling.” I’d reply, “Oh. I’ll do the recycling.” It would go poorly.

Rachel Green – Friends (Jennifer Aniston): Pretty + a little spoiled = Kryptonite.

Pam Halpert – The Office (Jenna Fischer): She’s cute and nice. And she likes tall, sarcastic guys with questionable hair. I feel like I’d have a solid shot there.

Seven of Nine – Star Trek: Voyager (Jeri Ryan): Can you imagine if she had been on the (original) Enterprise? The things Kirk would have done to try to impress her and get in her spacepants. Drag-racing with Romulans. A pack of smokes shoved up the sleeve of his Starfleet uniform. A tattoo that says “Only Captains have a log.”

Janice – The Muppet Show: She looked worldly. Like she knew stuff. She went a little heavy on the eye make-up, for my liking, but cool guitar-playing chicks are all too rare.

Brooke Davis – One Tree Hill (Sophia Bush): Uhm. Is there any way I can come up with reasons here without admitting I’ve ever watched One Tree Hill?

Who are your TV crushes?

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14 Responses

  1. Sarah A Hall says:

    I wanted to say hi first off. I read your blog. I just am horrible at commenting (I shall try to be a better blogger in the future – I promise). I totally agree with your last choice! Hope you don’t mind – you have inspired me to do a similar post over on my blog.

    Happy blogging!
    Sarah

  2. Sarah says:

    First of all, I can’t believe you’d choose Janice over Piggy. I mean, come on! Who is more cute and spoiled than Miss Piggy?

    Second (of all?) Are there only two female muppets? Why can’t I think of any more female muppets???

  3. WW says:

    I’m with you on Donna, Amy, Lorelei, and Pam. I’d also thrown in Stars Hollow Rory and Sydney Bristow from Alias.

  4. sid says:

    gill grissom from the original csi. The male lead in law and order: criminal intent. i guess i have a thing for cops. or older men …

  5. I’m glad you said Pam. Everyone always talks about how great Jim is, but Pam is equally as awesome.

  6. Rene Foran says:

    You rule the northern hemisphere because you said Janice.
    And Stick It is a guilty little pleasure of mine…tell Missy that :)

  7. Melissa says:

    Even I’d date Brooke Davis from OTH and I don’t even swing that way!

  8. Krystle says:

    Sooo, I haven’t even read the rest of the list, but the fact that Lorelai Gilmore is the first one filled me with joy beyond measure! She is everything I aspire to be and more. Guh. LOVE!

  9. Danielle says:

    Not too familiar with anyone from this list besides Rachel and Pam. Pam, very girl next door, Rachel, trying to be GND. I can’t remember the muppet’s clearly, and I don’t watch the other shows, but I agree with WW that Sydney Bristow should be throw in.

    I thought about my TV faux-boyfriends and just realized most of them are broken men, but have glimmers of something good, that could be seen… If they weren’t busy trying to push people away. I need therapy.

  1. July 28, 2012

    […] over at peterdewolf.com wrote a post VERY similar to this one (I think we even have some of the same women on our list!) […]

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