sometimes i just sit and type with no plan

i feel like
if i was dating
a girl
and she was
an evil super villain
as many are
i’d be torn
you know
cause i’m a
loyal dude
but if she’s
trying to bring
down all my town’s
super heroes
that’s probably
not cool
even though
her curves
in spandex
you heard me
i said
i should be able to
see the signs
you know
like if one time
i say
with your looks
and my charm
our offspring
could take over
the world
or earn
a pretty solid living
as a grifter
and she puts down
the book she
was reading
‘chicken soup
for megalomaniacs’
pulls a sheet over the
cosmic death ray
she’s been working on
and asks
you think so
that’s probably
a solid indication
and if she yells
by the power of greyskull
and then
encases me in carbonite
because i hung
the toilet paper
so it spools
over the top
that might make
dinner time
a little tense
and stuff
so yeah
it could be
weird dating
an evil super villain
gotta be better
than dating
a sex and the city fan

19 thoughts on “sometimes i just sit and type with no plan

  1. every girl is a sex and the city fan. not every girl is vocal about it, but sit them in a room with an episode that happens to correspond to their current love life situation, and TRY to pry them away.

      • I can only say this is untrue because I’ve never ever seen an episode of sex and the city.

        I maaaay be a secret fan… but! I’ll never know because I refuse to watch it (and Twilight. ugh.)

        p.s. I like hockey.

        Seriously why do I not have a boyfriend? I think I’m in the wrong country.

  2. Peter… let’s be honest. Descartes said “I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am.” For us men, that translates to “I date, therefore she’s in control, therefore she is a evil super villan… with a metric fuckton of kryptonite.” And, I’m preeeety sure you wouldn’t care which shows she watches as long as it’s your “cosmic death ray” she works on under the sheet. :-O

    And, really, don’t we men have to hold “BIG” out as the one super hero who prevails in that vast sea of evil? Grins…

  3. I’ve never seen sex and the city. Is that a bad thing? It just doesn’t appeal.

    I thought the toilet paper was supposed to go over the top.

    Also, I want a copy of ‘chicken soup for megalomaniacs’.

    Lastly, I don’t think being encased in carbonite would make dinner time tense. Just quiet. Unless she talks to herself, of course.

    I should stop rambling in your comments now.

  4. Hahahahaahaha.


    I like this one, a lot.

    But, seriously, there is nothing better than Sex and the City… I grew up emotionally on that shit.

    Oh… wait…

  5. Toilet paper should spool from the BOTTOM.


    Also I kind of want to make a fake book cover that says Chicken Soup for Megalomaniacs and then read it everywhere. Cause stirring shit up is just the way I roll.

  6. Ha! That’s awesome. I guess I wouldn’t want to date a super villain either. Unless they were taller than me and had all of their teeth. Hey… slim pickings!

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