sometimes i just sit and type with no plan

i feel like
if i was dating
a girl
and she was
an evil super villain
as many are
i’d be torn
you know
cause i’m a
loyal dude
but if she’s
trying to bring
down all my town’s
super heroes
that’s probably
not cool
even though
her curves
in spandex
jfwnfjknerwjfgre
you heard me
i said
jfwnfjknerwjfgre
i should be able to
see the signs
you know
like if one time
i say
baby
with your looks
and my charm
our offspring
could take over
the world
or earn
a pretty solid living
as a grifter
and she puts down
the book she
was reading
‘chicken soup
for megalomaniacs’
pulls a sheet over the
cosmic death ray
she’s been working on
and asks
you think so
that’s probably
a solid indication
and if she yells
by the power of greyskull
and then
encases me in carbonite
because i hung
the toilet paper
so it spools
over the top
that might make
dinner time
a little tense
and stuff
so yeah
it could be
weird dating
an evil super villain
but
still
gotta be better
than dating
a sex and the city fan

You may also like...

19 Responses

  1. Meghan says:

    baahah. it’s “sex AND the city.”

  2. I would love to yell ‘by the power of greyskull’ and encase you in carbonite…

  3. AshleyD says:

    I think we can no longer be friends.

  4. Laura says:

    every girl is a sex and the city fan. not every girl is vocal about it, but sit them in a room with an episode that happens to correspond to their current love life situation, and TRY to pry them away.

    • Peter DeWolf says:

      I may never marry.

      • Angela says:

        I can only say this is untrue because I’ve never ever seen an episode of sex and the city.

        I maaaay be a secret fan… but! I’ll never know because I refuse to watch it (and Twilight. ugh.)

        p.s. I like hockey.

        Seriously why do I not have a boyfriend? I think I’m in the wrong country.

  5. DCPTexas says:

    Peter… let’s be honest. Descartes said “I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am.” For us men, that translates to “I date, therefore she’s in control, therefore she is a evil super villan… with a metric fuckton of kryptonite.” And, I’m preeeety sure you wouldn’t care which shows she watches as long as it’s your “cosmic death ray” she works on under the sheet. :-O

    And, really, don’t we men have to hold “BIG” out as the one super hero who prevails in that vast sea of evil? Grins…

  6. Wendryn says:

    I’ve never seen sex and the city. Is that a bad thing? It just doesn’t appeal.

    I thought the toilet paper was supposed to go over the top.

    Also, I want a copy of ‘chicken soup for megalomaniacs’.

    Lastly, I don’t think being encased in carbonite would make dinner time tense. Just quiet. Unless she talks to herself, of course.

    I should stop rambling in your comments now.

  7. Lindsay says:

    Hahahahaahaha.

    Nice.

    I like this one, a lot.

    But, seriously, there is nothing better than Sex and the City… I grew up emotionally on that shit.

    Oh… wait…

  8. Between this and your hatred for Tina Fey, I am sad to say, Peter, my ridiculous crush on you is gone, gone, gone. I love SATC, and not even a little bit ironically.

  9. krystal says:

    a sex and the city fan, i am not. i will watch it with my friends but i own no dvd’s and know no quotes. i’m kind of proud of it =)

  10. Shelley says:

    Toilet paper should spool from the BOTTOM.

    God.

    Also I kind of want to make a fake book cover that says Chicken Soup for Megalomaniacs and then read it everywhere. Cause stirring shit up is just the way I roll.

  11. Cindy says:

    Ha! That’s awesome. I guess I wouldn’t want to date a super villain either. Unless they were taller than me and had all of their teeth. Hey… slim pickings!

  12. definitely on my top ten list. you. well, this little ditty. or doodle. or whatever. not sex and the city. ally mcbeal is on THAT list.

  13. apparently i comment with no plan.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *