Any time I hear, “I’m just enjoying being single,” I don’t completely believe it.
And most of the time I don’t buy it at all.
Unless you just broke up with a raging asshole, a good relationship trumps being single every time.
I also don’t buy “I’m no good with relationships or feelings.”
You’re being a wuss. And that is absolutely your prerogative, but don’t try to pass it off as you just being very in touch with who you are.
You’re just refusing to risk it for love. Totally your call. But you’re missing out.
You’ve been hurt before. They didn’t love you back. Or they did and just didn’t treat you right.
Try again. That’s it. That’s my advice. Try again.
With someone new.
Or with that person who still owns your heart, but poor judgement, miscommunication, bad advice, pride, or stubbornness is keeping you away from.
Double fuck stubbornness.
Pretty much anything awesome you can do single, you can do when you’re in a relationship with the right person. And it’ll be better.
The right partner has your back.
Want to travel? The right person will travel with you, or be waiting at home with the biggest, strongest welcome home hug.
Want to write a book? The right person lifts you on the hard days, reads your work and gives feedback.
Want to quit your job and follow your dreams? The right person helps you draft your letter of resignation.
Want to ‘get to know yourself’? The right person is there when that journey hits some potholes.
Want a shoulder to be offered to catch your 2 am tears when you can’t control your breathing or stop thinking about anxieties you can’t really explain but are absolutely everything in that moment? Want someone to buy you two dozen cherry popsicles because it is the only kind you like and you feel so sick so sick and it hurts to swallow and you just want to hide under the covers? Want someone to kiss you and touch you and love you like their unit is shipping out in the morning? Want someone to take care of insects that seemed so much bigger and leggier in the dark? Want someone who gets it when you explain and still gets it when you can’t muster up the energy to try? Want someone who you catch looking at you like you’re Christmas morning? Want someone who feels like they’re missing a limb when they’re not touching you? Want someone who would absolutely go to war if someone so much as looked at you the wrong way? Want someone who doesn’t just let you be you, but encourages it and basks in it?
The right person can and will do all of that. And more.
“I’m just enjoying being single” sounds a lot like “I’m just making the best of my current situation.”
I get that.
You can take life’s lemons and make lemonade if you like.
Or you can toss them out and buy chocolate milk.
And lemonade sucks.
Thus endeth the lesson.