The other night, my family had a Christmas tree-decorating supper dealie. The Monkey was there. At some point during the festivities, while pictures were being taken, she said, “No photographs. I wish my fans would leave me alone. I need my ME time.” Then she made a faux-bratty exhale sound.
Five minutes later, she started singing Beyonce’s “All the single ladies…” song and dancing around and slapping her own ass
Five minutes after that, she had taken out her own clip-in hair streak thing and was attaching it to everyone’s hair and having picures taken. (Her Dad has a brush cut and had a clip-in dealie hanging down from each side.) I was minding my own business and watching football when…
(In the long and storied history of bad pictures of me, this one is right up there. A few things to keep in mind: 1) I do own and wear other shirts. 2) I am not actually stoned, my expression is in the process of returning to it’s regular unexpressive self after making a face at her. 3) I was making a face at her because she tried to drive the plastic clip part of the hair thing through my skull. And then giggled when I complained.)