rambling about music and junk, future wife

Hiiiiiiiii, you.

So, I love music.  I do.  I listen to it all day long.

And sometimes (often) I get the overwhelming urge to share this music.  As my friends, who some days get a half dozen invitations to download shit from dropbox, can attest to.

I want someone who doesn’t mind random songs appearing in her inbox throughout the day.  Someone who doesn’t need an explanation as to why each song is awesome.

Someone who just loves that a certain song made me think of her.

You know?

Like if it’s 2:45 pm on a rainy Wednesday and I feel that you absolutely NEED to hear Paul Westerberg’s “Waiting For Somebody,” I want to be able to just send it over to you.

But here’s the thing:

I want you to love it too.

And I’ll be completely confused if you don’t.

Actually this is more of a general thing with me.  I was telling a friend last night that I am kind of demanding.  (In a “sure you adore me, but do you adore me enough?” kind of way.)

I’ll expect you to be excited by what excites me.

Completely unreasonable?


I won’t be angry if you aren’t, I’ll just be… baffled.

My demandingness comes out in other ways too.  For example, if I like you, I’ll do anything for you.


But if I ask you to do something and you don’t…

It’s like a personal affront.

Largely because I hate asking anyone for anything at any time.

Also if you tell me you are going to do something and then don’t…

Bad bananas.

And I’ll still remember it seven years later.

It’s not all word doodles and Canadian charm, my lovely little future wife.

On the plus side, things are very unlikely to escalate into a fight.

I don’t really fight.

In fact I am pretty decent at defusing most couple-y disagreements.

I’ll listen — really listen — to your side.  I’ll explain my side calmly and without using words or phrases that might exacerbate the situation.  (“Sure I was looking at your friend’s ass, but it’s a great ass!”) I’ll give you space.  I’ll use humour.

And I’ll still always hug you, even if I’m mad.


But, really, you might as well just love “Waiting for Somebody.”  It’ll be easier on all of us.


– ps  I decided to make you a mix CD, FW.  I wanted to call it “A Present of Songs from the Past for Future Wife.”  But then realized that some of the songs are current.  And that the title sucks.  Instead I am calling it “Lady Gaga’s Vagina: War Criminal or No?”  Yes I am.  And it’s not really a CD.  You can download it from dropbox.  E-mail me for an invite.  (Same goes for the rest of you nosypantses reading this letter that isn’t addressed to you.)





photo credit: mkudel via photopin cc

19 thoughts on “rambling about music and junk, future wife

  1. i was JUST trying to explain to someone earlier this week, the need for a connection on the music level. they did not understand. i’m making them read this. obviously they are not future spouse material.

  2. “Also if you tell me you are going to do something and then don’t…”
    I’m with you on that one. I’ll remember that shit for more than 7 years! Also, I wish all men knew how to fight like that. You can get out of anything with humor and hugs.

  3. If your Future Wife says she’ll do something and then doesn’t…um, maybe she shouldn’t be your Future Wife. Because that is truly BAD BANANAS. And not even the kind that are still okay because you can use them to make banana bread. More like the kind that bring the fruit flies into your kitchen.

    And nobody wants fruit flies in the kitchen. Except maybe my genetics professor. He really liked killing those things.

  4. If I share something with hubby, I want him to not only acknowledge it, but love it as much as I do too, no matter how impractical it is (like opening the windows during a pouring rain storm so the house can soak up that perfect rain scent).

    I get what you wrote. Completely. And my favorite part?

    “And I’ll still always hug you, even if I’m mad.”

    This quality in my hubby melts my heart. It’s exactly what I need. Every time.

  5. “waiting for somebody”- pretty sure this is my theme song. It’s pretty catchy too. Might have to hit replay a few times.

    and humor is the best way to diffuse a situation :)

    and hugs? are the best. no matter what.

  6. I’m very intrigued. But I don’t know what dropbox is. So I’m intrigued and confused.

    Also, you need to quit being so adorable. You’re really setting the bar too high and I’m already picky and have high expectations as it is. I don’t need to be COMPARING. Geez.

  7. Would a girl writing a similar letter be interpreted as weird? Somehow I think so. I don’t know any girl who wouldn’t appreciate some midday, no-reason music in her inbox.

    Oh, and I’ve never heard that song.

  8. My husband and I don’t agree on all music, but I’ve introduced him to Sondheim, which he likes some of, and he’s introduced me to a few obscure Russian composers that I’ve become inordinately fond of. It’s hard to not want the person you are in love with (even if, at this point, she’s imaginary) to be made happy by the same things that make you happy. We do this, too, with music, with food, with books – “Here! Try this!” – and if the other person likes it, the happy feeling associated makes for even better memories connected to the music/food/book. It’s an increase in happiness when someone else shares your joy.

    Oh, and asking people for things really, really sucks. Complete agreement there.

    I like the way you argue!

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