It's true…

I learned something a long time ago.

Being tried as an adult sucks.

I also learned that…

Blogging is weird.

Over the past few days, I’ve been discussing blogging and the blogworld in general with two of my bestest blog friends. We’ve talked about how it seems to have changed. We’ve talked about jerkface, pussy-assed anonymous commenters.

Even the way in which I “met” these two awesome blog chicas is kind of odd. I discovered one through the blogroll of a NY musician. The second one discovered me through Indie Bloggers. And they were already friends. Weirder still is that the first one has been reading the blog of an ex of mine for years, so she already knew far too much about me.

Blogging is weird.

Take a look at your own blogroll. As in real life, you’ll see some that are friends of friends. But, then there’ll be some that you noticed leaving a nice/funny/sexy comment on another blog and you followed them home. You commented on them. They commented on you. You know how it goes. You may even be reading this because I saw your user pic someplace and thought that you were just so impossibly hot. We all have at least one of those on our blogroll.

Blogging is weird.

The blogworld sometimes has a high school vibe. Lots of cliques. Even in high school, I never felt like I fit in one. I always thought that the cool kids saw me as a smart kid. And the smart kids saw me as a class clown/slacker. And since I played basketball around the clock, I assumed that I got some votes as a “jock.” (Of course, as long as I could date the girls I was interested in, I really didn’t care.) Even on the day I graduated, a group of us were awarded “Certificates of Merit” for keeping a certain average in a specific group of classes. As we were being called up on stage for the certificates, the guy behind me in line leaned in and said, “Wow. I had no idea that you were smart.”

I also don’t feel like I fit into a blog clique. I am private and don’t like sharing personal information. (Except for ACN stories — she is too cute for me NOT to gush about.) And I don’t like recapping my days for my readers, because, well, I’ve already lived through it. I am already bored with it and want to move on to something creative. So, I’m an almost daily blogger that doesn’t like to share personal information or talk about his day to day activities.

Blogging is weird.

If you blog for long enough, at some point somebody is going to e-mail you to tell you that they have a raging crush on you. It is going to seem very odd to you that somebody can get to this point without even having exchanged e-mails or IM messages with you. It is going to seem very odd to you until you find yourself reading the post of a woman, becoming smitten with her words, and wanting to know her thoughts on, well, everything.

Blogging is weird.

It is hard, for me anyway, to gauge what kind of post might connect with readers. Today I could have churned out a half-assed post on relationships, while asking a few questions, and received thirty comments. Or I could have spent hours pouring everything I have into writing the (somewhat) heart-breaking short story that is bouncing around in my head and received three comments.

Blogging IS weird.

Yet here we all are.

0 thoughts on “It's true…

  1. I love the awkward emails we get. I even sort of like it when people send me emails calling me a slut (uh, what?) or a bitch (no really, what?). Because hey, that means they’re reading.

  2. “an ex of yours?” where are the complimentary adjectives? I cry shenanigans.

    And I have never ONCE gotten an “I have a crush on you” email. In seven years of blogging! Do I smell?

  3. stephanie: I assume that I do it because I am a masochist. How about you?

    miriam: Luckily my “do the right thing” chip kicks in and stops me from crushing (too much) on unavailable women.

    each of two: I am not sure what you are telling me here. But, I assure you that I took an obscenely long shower this morning.

    cait: I totally meant “slut” in a nice way. Actually, I very rarely get negative e-mails or comments. Maybe because they know I’ll either just delete… or tell them off. Perhaps both.

    hrc: An UNSMELLY ex of mine? I am actually genuinely surprised that you don’t get crush-mails. That’s what you get for hiding cuteness behind your anonymous blogger shield.

    mindy: Sister, I SO know what you mean. Besides, crimes of passion should not count.

  4. blogging IS weird. that is true.

    but it is something i couldn’t just up and stop doing. it is my stress relief, therapy and entertainment all in one :)

  5. michelle: Yeah, I hear you. I am all sorts of addicted. If I ever quit, my friends would be frequently subjected to long and meandering e-mails.

    Well, even MORE frequently.

  6. Peter of COURSE you’re going to get major crush emails. You’re the only male on most people’s blog rolls! Seriously- check out… there are so few males that one guy joined and then felt like he was infringing on a girls only party!

    Blogging is really weird. I hate technorati authority because it just quantifies popularity. And somebody at 140 won’t even deign to read a blog with authority 3. It does really bug me.

    About once a month or so I’m like “I think Ima gonna quit this biz” because it’s tiring. It’s just tiring.

    I don’t get awkward crush emails OR awkward “you’re a slut” emails. OH that’s because I don’t give an email address! Maybe I should, just to see what I can draw in. Hmmm

  7. Blogging is weird. And it has changed. And their are jackass commenters.

    And then there’s the awesome parts.

    Now, take off your pants.

    (Out of context that sounds pretty bad, huh?)

  8. I agree, blogging is very weird. But yet, i’m drawn to it like a moth to a flame. I’ve yet to get burned, aka get nasty emails etc but well, what bad things can you say about my thesis? ITS AWESOME.

    Ahem, sorry. I will discontinue patting myself on the back in your blog.

    I agree with Lisa, you’re the only male blogger on most peoples blogrolls so of course everyones going to have a blogcrush on you. You’re just awesome.

    Your letters thing tho? Not so awesome. EVERYTIME i comment it makes me retype them four different times. sheesh.

  9. lisa: Are you saying that I only get crush e-mails because I’m the only man around? And not because I am delightful? What happened to the Canadian solidarity?

  10. Ashley: Your thesis DOES look awesome. And thank you for calling me awesome. (See that, Lisa?) Sorry about those annoying letters. I had to put them back up because I spent three hours one day deleting spam comments. Bad medicine. Peter no like.

  11. blogging is weird and i agree with miriam that we’re one big happy family.

    or you know, a family that puts the “fun” in “dysfunctional” family.

  12. *waves* I haven’t been blog-crushed yet. But that’s okay. And you have an interesting point about what you write about – I don’t know how we ever choose what we say. I just write what I’m thinking. Which is sometimes nothing at all.

    As for the letters – methinks they should at least have them in different colors so they don’t all blend.

  13. You know what else is weird? I was just blogging about this a couple of days ago. Sort of. About how we (the collective we, not the specific one) cross paths all over internet. And we stumble on these blogs of complete strangers, that for whatever reason, suck us in. I was musing on all the ways I have “acquired” the blogs on my blogroll. I think it’s pretty cool the way blogging makes the world feel a little smaller. I actually met the two people who are now my very best friends as the result of leaving a comment on a blog.

    I also touched on how there are some blogs I read daily, but never leave comments because I feel like all awkward. I wonder what it is about blogging that has the power to send us straight back to high school…? Since I am supposed to be more confident now that I'm all grown up, I try to just jump in & comment… but some blogs, I just can't seem to make myself do it.

    Anyway. My long rambling point is that blogging is definitely weird, but in a fun way. I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure of a blogcrush yet though. Hmmm… Yep, right back to high school.

  14. You’re sooo right, especially about the clique part. I felt the same exact way as you in high school and still do in graduate school (which is sad). My blog is supposed to be where I can just be myself and not care, but even that’s difficult sometimes.

    I don’t fit into a clique either, because I don’t share everythinggg about my life (too many real life friends reading this!) But in general, I think I’m over the whole clique thing.

    And yeah, blogging is weird.

  15. Blogging IS weird. (How many comments do you think you’ll get with that as the opening line?) But I wouldn’t trade it for the world. It’s like free therapy. And yes, there are cliques and stupid people who leave mean comments, but overall, it brings us all together. And speaking for myself, it gives me something to do during the day, other than stare at the wall because my job is so boring. (Hope my boss isn’t reading this.) I also love to write, so it’s just a win win.

  16. blogging barbie: I’d prefer to put the “func” in it.

    That made no sense.

    distracted spunk: I am sure that you’ll get blog crushed on. I’ve made it clear that I am willing to put out. Like a demon. I think that helped.

    dawn: I think we all have blogs that we are initially nervous about posting on — for whatever reasons. I usually make it clear that I am willing to put out — Nevermind.

    susie: I hear you. Besides, I think that I would become incredibly bored if I tried to write in such a way to fit into any one clique.

    la: Yeah, the loving to write thing is what clinches it for me. I’d still be writing something even if none of you cool folks were showing up here.

  17. I’ve only been reading your blog for about 1-2 weeks now and I really like it. I’ve been blogging for a couple of years now I still feel like an outsider in the blogging cliques. I like many read blogs without leaving comments b/c I get this dreaded feeling that you get in High School when you are a semi-cool kid trying to break into the really cool kid crowd.

    I need to re-do my blog roll. I lost it when I moved to one of molly’s templates (which is totally awesome btw) and come to think of it I had no guys on it. So when I do get around to it I will add you. :)

  18. Blogging isn’t weird.

    Sorry, I just had to be different – it totally is.

    Blogging is so high school, it’s true. You get in where you fit in, or you sit in the corner talking to yourself. Or thinking up a good comment to get other readers to come visit you. [This isn’t one of those comments, as you will soon find out.] Like baking cookies for the basketball team.

    I don’t get 40+ comments on my posts, but I think I might freak out if I did, because who the hell is reading my blog?

    I also haven’t gotten any blogcrushes yet, but maybe I have one now.

    Props for being interesting without talking about yourself or your day. That must mean you actually have something to say!

  19. I really like this post. And I agree with you. Blogging can be weird but at the same time it really makes the world a lot smaller. Which is nice.

  20. Bloogging is weird…and it seems to be on the brain of every blogger out there as we are all doing blogs on blogging!Maybe this is a clique and we don’t know we’re in it yet….

  21. This really struck me because I’, charging into another blogger meet and greet for tomorrow evening with friends old and new–I mean, what’s this all for if we can’t all get drunk and make out?

    You just wait for the 123Valerie Canadian World Tour of Canada and Canadian Cities, PDW.

    It’s gonna be “hellified.” Or something.

  22. only weird people would write in what is essentially an online “diary” for the world to read.

    at least, that’s what i think.

    so blogging is weird, cuz we’re weird.

    as i haven’t been blogging all that long, i don’t know what it used to be like, but i get the clique thing. i think, however, with the anonymity of the internet, maybe it puts us more on equal ground and lets our talent or lack thereof determine popularity? maybe not. i dunno.

  23. Yes, blogging is weird. And you know what? Just once, I want to get one of those crush emails from someone who can spell. Is that too much to ask?

  24. Well now I’m worried!
    I am very new to this bloggin thing and I am suddenly very unsure about the things I have written already!!! Though it is fun to read your stuff. which I have been doing….. silently…. secretly too…. but had to speakout about this…. coz you are simply too funny. And right by the way.

  25. blogging IS weird…and all of that other stuff you said. amen.

    it is the addiction that’s good for us and bad for us all at the same time and we repeatedly try to leave it behind, but it won’t be left.

    p.s. you rock.

  26. I wish I’d seen this post earlier. I agree totally: blogging is weird. And cliquish and silly and catty. Definite high school vibe. I’m a niche-less blogger (actually, I think I’m a mommy-blogger without children), and though I’ve never felt the urge to pigeon-hole myself, it’s almost inevitable.

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