i’m the one wearing a baseball cap, future wife

Dear Future Wife,

Happy New Year, lady.

I was chatting with a friend the other day.  The conversation came around to my letters to you.  She said that my letters could be intimidating because I’m basically illustrating the “perfect woman.”

I had never really thought about that.

Mostly because I never thought that “can rock a pony tail” is some kind of universal mark of perfection.

Or nose scrunches.

Or if she replies to “You’re pretty” with “I know.”

Then we discussed the very real difference between “perfect” and “perfect for me.”

And I mentioned how your flaws (and I hate to use the word, really) are going to allow me to really be… me.  And vice versa.

She “duh”d me.  She’s like that.

And, because we are the preeminent thinkers of our time, we discussed how the perfect person just knows how to deal with you.

For me, that sometimes means making it all about you so that I can get out of my own head and focus on someone else.

My initial (unspoken) reaction of “Is EVERYTHING about you, woman??” will quickly fade and give way to me really listening.

And caring.

We also discussed barriers.  This would bring some down.

She felt that even in my most honest posts on here, I still have barriers up.

I almost “duh”d her.

Of course.

She feels that I’d have no barriers with you.

This is true.

She feels that I wouldn’t need to write word doodles to you.

This is true.


I think I’d want to anyway.

And I have.

You should maybe add this stuff to the “manual” I started in my last letter.

Somehow we also found our way to discussing photos.  And I wondered aloud (a-typed?) if you could fall for a photo of someone.  Well, for the feelings it causes.  (And I don’t mean like the love I had for the Christie Brinkley poster I had on my ceiling as a kid.)

Is it possible you are sensing something from the picture?

I don’t know.

Or are you just projecting?  Are you just writing their story?

Most likely.


Do you think I’d recognize a picture of you?






photo credit: A___G via photopin cc

17 thoughts on “i’m the one wearing a baseball cap, future wife

  1. That’s funny because today Hope and I were talking about small differences that are actually big differences. You discussed ‘perfect’ and ‘perfect for you’, and we discussed ‘that pattern on a dress’ and ‘that pattern on leggings’. These are both highly important topics, I’m sure you will agree. What’s my point? I’m sure I had one.
    Ah yes, I served Hope with the same quote I’m about to give you: ‘The difference between the right word and the almost right word is like the difference between lightening and a lightening bug.
    That’s not really a point, is it? I’m just rambling. Hm.

    Also, it’s quite funny how one can feel smug about fitting into two of the criteria mentioned concerning the perfect woman. I don’t think I’m perfect fo ryou though; I’m just perfect. Really, ask Hope. Hell, ask anyone. (Except maybe my ex boyfriends. Though a bunch of them would agree too. Not that there’s a HUGE bunch of ex boyfriends out there. I think.)

    I’m going to shut up now.

  2. Peter.

    I don’t know why, but this post brought a little sparkling tear to my eye. I love this line: Do you think I’d recognize a picture of you?

    It just makes me feel warm inside. You commented on my blog earlier today but this is the first time I’ve read your stuff. It’s very good. Keep writing.


  3. the best part is that there are about 20 women reading these posts saying, shit i wanna meet this guy, if only i had the guts, maybe i’m the FW.
    you write intrigue without even trying.

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