If the past couple of days were a television ad for an upcoming movie…

Some of the scenes included would be:

The ACN deciding yesterday morning that I would be “PuppyPete” instead of Uncle Pete. (And that she would be Puppy[ACN.])

Each of us barking. Hers sounding like “Uppp!” (CUTE.)

Me getting head rushes while panting. (Sucky lack of oxygen. Damn you ragweed! Or whatever that yellow horse shit is.)

Her wanting me to eat any food that falls on her “super girl cape” — like her puppy does at home.

And her wanting me to pee on the lawn. (She still thinks this is a good idea.)


The Monkey demonstrating EVERY dance move in Rhianna’s “S.O.S.” video — between feeding The ACN blueberries.


The ACN howling with delight as I hammered my shoulder into the edge of an open door and called it a “wooden bastard.”


Me getting the munchkin dressed this morning. (Blue capris with matching blue and white shirt — she picked ’em.)

Pete: “You are the cutest little twerp EVER. You look just like me.*
ACN: Yeah.
Pete: Is Uncle Pete cute?
ACN: Yeah!
Pete: Do you love Uncle Pete though?
ACN shaking head no.
Pete: Whaaaaaaaah!! *sniffle*
ACN: Hee hee hee
Pete: Do you like making Uncle Pete cry?
ACN: YEAH!!!!!!

(* In my defense, I grew up in a house where every day my father would comb his hair in the bathroom mirror and yell to my mother, “My God… you are SO lucky to be married to someone as handsome as me.”)


Me making two mixed CDs for The ACN. Her laughing and screeching happily to something called “Crazy Frog.” (I think it includes subliminal messages, “Cheer or we’ll whack Elmo.”) And a mixed CD with songs that she and The Monkey enjoyed this week — including “Smack That.”


Me trying to give The Monkey’s Mom a CD I burned for The Monkey Dad with a buttload of Johnny Cash songs. The Monkey Mommy saying “Oh no… I HATE Johnny Cash.” And then The Monkey staring at her seriously, before singing in a deep voice, “I fell in to a burnin’ ring of fire…”

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