I woke up much earlier than usual this morning, love.
The cool autumn air forcing me to instinctively burrow deeper under the generous covers.
I squinted the clock into focus.
The only light in the room.
I licked dry lips, knowing full well that comfort and darkness and laziness would conspire to keep me from immediately slaking this thirst.
Sleep crept further away from me.
I was okay with it.
I started thinking about you.
A smile formed underneath blankets that were pulled up to my nose.
Weddings have been a big topic in my universe lately, it seems.
A couple I half know are heading towards marriage.
And I wondered how one would propose when she knows it’s coming.
And then I wondered how I would propose.
I rolled over on my left side.
I got snugglier still.
When I propose to you…
Anyone who really knows me — or has read my novel — would not be surprised that I’d want a proposal to be all sorts of epic.
For me, the grander and… romanticer a gesture, the better.
But I also want it to be fun… and silly… and poignant… and romantic…
I am sure it’ll be a plan I keep trying to improve on right up until I open the ring box, but I’m excited to have some unique ideas for the proposal. You’ll seeeeeeee.
I want you to have the perfect story to tell family and friends and Facebook.
When dudes ask me, “Gave her the ring and popped the question, eh?” I’ll just smile and nod. I’ll be thinking about the squinting of your eyes, as joyful tears escaped as you kissed me harder than expected and you tried to remember the plan you made long ago for the order in which you’ll tell everyone, as you jumped to your feet, mumbling about something you saw on Wedding Bee.
And the marrieds will make their comments.
“Well that’s one way to ruin a perfectly good relationship.”
They’ll smile their all-knowing smiles.
Except they don’t.
I waited a long time for this.
For a chance to be part of a team working towards forever.
For a partner.
And they’ll be walking away laughing and thinking, “He thinks he’s immune. He thinks it’ll be different for him.”
And I’ll smile, well aware that nothing comes easy.
But I’ll know it WILL be different for me.
I’ll have you.