I found myself in another interesting conversation with a friend this morning.
It was about love and dating and other affaires de coeur.
I should say up front that she is brilliant, wise and all-around impressive.
I told her about how I feel like the bar is rising daily and that I’m getting pickier and pickier.
She warned of falling into the trap of hopeless ideals.
And I laughed. Out loud.
Not because she’s wrong. She’s not.
Not because it’s not good advice. It is.
I laughed because…
Well here’s the actual thing:
I’m a fucking catch.
I’m never going to settle.
And I’m never going to be with someone who feels like she’s settling.
Nothing is going to be perfect, obviously, for either of us.
But we both have to feel like, “Holy shitnuggets! I need to be with this person!”
Being wanted is fine, if you’re bored. It’s okay.
But being absolutely needed, in their heart and soul? Why would any of us ever consider accepting less?
I told her I’m focusing on being cool with being single, on being generally awesome and on accomplishing amazing things. (I am working on a novel now that you’re going to LOVE.)
She asked, “Don’t you think you have to look?”
I told her that I think it’s a fine line. It’s too easy to get caught up in the looking. I told her that I am just going to be open to, and aware of, anyone awesome who crosses my path (in person, on-line, wherever.)
I assume you’re not showing up yet because you’re silly or stubborn or figuring things out. YOU.
But I’ll be ready for you when you arrive.
When you do, you’ll know I didn’t settle.
And we’re both going to reap the benefits of my wisdom (and distinguished good looks.)
Ideals don’t have to be hopeless.
Standards are never negotiable.
And we’re going to be absolute fucking magic.