Flip-off Friday #4


.
Originally uploaded by craigemorsels.

Usually these entries are about the flipper-offer.

But, not this time.

Sure, her story is interesting. This attractive young lady once dated an amazing guy. Tall. Canadian, I believe. Prolific blogger. Gives great massages.

But, this story is about her two companions.

The gentleman in the middle is named “Ralph.” However, his friends call him “the Swede.”

He loves the NY Jets, the NY Rangers, Famous Ray’s Pizza (no, the other one,) and the Lipizzaner Stallions. Don’t you judge him…

The Jets aren’t THAT bad.

The Swede is also a little sarcastic. Earlier in the evening he had this exchange:

The Swede: “This crowd makes me feel dirty. I need a SILKWOOD shower.”

Random Drunk: “Like from the movie?”

The Swede: “No… Tommy Silkwood. He was in my 4th grade gym class. That motherfucker knew how to scrub.”

The comely lass to his right… no left. No, it’s his right. Her name is “Samantha.”

Friends call her; Sam, Sammy, Sammypants, Gretchen, Sammabanana, and Whore. (The people who call her the last one aren’t really close friends.)

Sam once drove two hours to wait in line for another three to attend a Rush Limbaugh book signing. When it was her turn, she spit in his face. Ladylike or no, that was damn sexy. The security guards, however, did not agree. She yelled “Attica!” as the dragged her away.

While all three of these people are very different, they do have some things in common. All three will go home to empty apartments at the end of the night. All three will eat ice cream as they catch up on their TIVOing. All three will opt for the second bowl of Chunky Monkey.

But, at beddy-bye time, only one will put on Rainbow Brite jammies.

You might be surprised which one.

3 thoughts on “Flip-off Friday #4

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *