An open letter to my hair…


I must say that you are looking awesome today.

Typically I would refer to you as cheveux dangereux, but something is different. Through some confluence of follicular aberrations, you have fallen nicely into place.

You normally save such an occurance for the day I am going to get my hair cut.

But, I am not one to look a gift horse in the… mane?

We’ve been through a lot. Remember the brush cut incident of ’89? We learned a great lesson that day: when a buddy agrees that you both should shave your heads, and then tells you to go first, he is likely going to tell the barber, “Just a little off the sides” when it is his turn.

And you were completely right back in the day about shaving the lightning bolts and my basketball number into my head. Bad idea jeans. I saw a picture of it recently. I’ll spare you the pain.

Oh, remember the crazy lady on Spring Garden Rd. during university? I told you that when she has a “Most Creative Hair Dresser” award on her counter that it is time to run away. But, you said we needed a trim. You weren’t so cocky when she suddenly shaved our sideburns off above our ears. I still wake up at night with the chills. However, I know that it’s not your fault that she had a fetish for army guys.

Still, the most important thing is that we were both right about the Billy Idol spiked ‘do in junior high. That was fucking super! I wonder if I could pull that off now.

So, again, thanks for looking awesome today.

-ps Anything you can do to fight off the oncoming grey would be greatly appreciated.

0 thoughts on “An open letter to my hair…

  1. Days like that are great aren’t they? Sometimes you just wake up and things up top are already looking great or you simply towel off after a shower and somehow your hair just looks better than it usually does.

    For the most part though, I’ve given up the fight against my hair. It’s either spiky or mussy now and frankly that’s the happiest situation for both of us. And despite all those poor decisions you may have put yourself through, at least you were never tricked into a perm.

    *curls up in a corner and cries*

  2. hey, you know what, i look great today. i’m sending the same letter to my hair.

    i hope we’re not really related, then we can be friends.

  3. gruns: My hair is available for one on one counselling sessions. And it will be doing the lecture circuit in the fall.

    heather: “Flesh for Fantasy” has been stuck in my head for days.

  4. Does this truly work? Does writing letters to your fur really encourage it to look fantabulous? If so, I definitely plan on using this tactic to score with some hot female felines.

  5. Hi Zeus:

    Thanks for dropping in.

    My hair doesn’t typically listen to anything I say, write, send with carrier pigeons, but this time I thought I’d try a little positive reinforcement.

    The jury is still out on whether or not it worked.

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