So I was recently informed that I don’t write enough about myself on this blog.
That seemed… odd to me.
Partially because I am a raging (and adorable) narcissist.
But mostly because I always felt as though if you read me, you know me.
I think there is more of “me” in my word doodles than the more journal-y bloggers put in their posts.
Maybe that isn’t clear.
Maybe I don’t want it to be.
So I thought I’d try writing a post about me. And, if it doesn’t blow, I’ll post it AND use it as my “about me” dealie on here. Two birds and all that. So if you are reading this, I have decided that I don’t completely hate this post.
I likely hate it a little.
I figure a good place to start is with some questions I am somewhat frequently asked:
Are you like THIS in real life?
First of all, I always take that as a compliment. Regardless of the inflection and/or judging eyes.
Am I like this? Well I do talk like this. But more mumbly and with a Canadian accent. If I talked to you in person, you’d recognize me from my writing, I think.
IF I talked to you.
Because, well, maybe I wouldn’t.
I’m not super outgoing. I’m not shy. It’s more of a dislike of being the center of attention. Despite the fact that I think everyone in the world should read my blog and fawn all over me. Kidding. I think everyone should read it… and give me money.
If there is a large group of people at a party, you’re more likely to find me on the outskirts of the group, shooting the shit with one person. Arms crossed. Making snarky comments.
And if hugging breaks out everywhere, you’ll see me cringe. I’m not a big hugger. Well that’s not true. I’m not a big hugger of people I am not romantically involved with. Or related to. And only my niece gets hugs, really. Sometimes The Monkey too, but hers are accompanied by “You’re a pain in the ass.”
A buddy of mine is a hugger. I see him once a year and he hugs at the beginning of the meet-up and again at the end. I think that’s excessive. Unless we just won the Superbowl — on a pass I threw to you with no time left on the clock — you should back the fuck up off of me. (I think that’s why he goes for two hugs.)
I’ve been known to say to people, “Yeah, this hug has lasted long enough. Get.”
(I sound delightful, right?)
So, yeah, I am sometimes like this in real life.
And other times not at all.
Why are you single?
I feel like I answered this a couple days ago.
And my anti-hugging rant in an earlier paragraph may also factor in.
Also, between you and me, being a romantic idealist in a tiny town with no dating pool is not awesome.
YOU wrote a book? Really?
Yes. Fucking read it.
Do you REALLY think you’re as adorable as you say?
I’m sorry. Can you repeat that? I was busy marveling at something cute I said or did or thought.
Really though, is ANYONE as adorable as I claim to be?
What was the question?
Why did you start a blog?
I wrote a post about this a couple of years ago. I skimmed it and it seems reasonably accurate.
Originally PeterDeWolf.com wasn’t going to be a blog though. It was going to be something of an online writing sample. (Which I suppose it is.) And I was going to do a separate blog called “A Certain Understated Stupidity.”
I got lazy and only wanted to work on one thing.
The blog blog was going to be anonymous. I’m still not sure how that would have affected my posts.
Also I LOVE to write.
And I love talking about writing.
You can sometimes distract me with talking about a nice ass (or an actual nice ass) or a discussion about sports, but otherwise I can talk about writing for days.
What/who are word doodles based on?
This is my new official reply.
Word doodles can be based on:
1) Women I am involved with on some level.
2) Women I have been involved with in the past.
3) Idealized woman I hope to meet in the future.
4) Anne Hathaway.*
The fuck ARE word doodles anyway?
Poetry’s riffraff cousin.
Who are these characters you sometimes write about?
The ACN is my amazing niece.
The Monkey is my (not so) little cousin. She lives across the street from me.
The HRC is my (occasionally) delightful ex Jen. And sometimes I just call her “Jen.” You know, cause that’s her name and stuff. I have other exes, but she is the only one who admits to reading here, so I have to say nice things about her.
What has surprised you most about blogging?
That people read my blog. For real.
When I started blogging, only Jen read my posts. Then she paid off a friend of hers to read too. And, really, that was about the level of traffic that it deserved.
That I now get lovely emails from people from all over the world blows my mind.
Some other tidbits…
brandy and I are not in a secret romance. Never have been. Leave her alone and stop asking.
Jenn is not my ex Jen, so you don’t have to Google that anymore.